Why are gay men attracted to me
What Gay and Bi Men Really Want
Are physical and sexual attraction the most appealing qualities in a partner? Or are unseen qualities like good manners and reliability the most attractive?
Following on from his investigate into what vertical women want and what straight men want, D&M Research’s managing director Derek Jones has taken the next sensible step with his latest study into what gay and bi(sexual) men want.
In order to scoop deeper and illustrate out a correct list of turn-ons and turn-offs for gay and bi men, Derek once again used of the Im-Ex Polygraph method. He originally devised this procedure of analysis to distinguish what people say they want from brands, products or services from what they really want by comparing stated versus derived measures of importance.
Qualities the gay and bi men said they desired in a partner (‘stated’) were compared to the qualities present in example celebrities they nominated as attractive (‘implied’). The identical comparison was made between stated and implied negative qualities, to determine what attributes are really the biggest turn-offs.
What gay and bi men say they want
Just like linear women and unbent men, “we delight in be
I'm a Woman Who's Sleeping With a Gay Man (Yes, He's Still Gay)
For the past year, I’ve been having regular sex with a gay dude I'll call Oliver. We were foremost friends for years, attending many Identity festival parades and taking weekend hiking trips. But last year, after a very drunken night, we slept together—and we still are today. He maintains that he still is, and always has been, a same-sex attracted man.
After the first time, we were predictably awkward and British about it. We laughed a bit that it had happened, and then we agreed we shouldn’t perform it again.
That lasted maybe three days. The first limited months had all the expected electrifying parts of sleeping with your top bud, but they were also tinged with this identity new fresh thing. Oliver had never been with a woman before, and he was completely unaware of what a vulva or a clitoris was. Fortunately, Oliver had the benefit of my feminist Orgasm Gap rants over the past five years, and took to the task of making me come with admirable tenacity. One of the sweetest moments of that year was finding the book She Comes First on his bedside table.
Men I’ve slept with before often have this false bravado around sex, like they need
LastweekI took to my Facebook wall to repost this HuffPost article about 13 straight male German stars kissing for a GQ photo shoot to protest homophobia and intolerance. Some gay men posted and sent me messages stating that they found it erotic to watch two vertical men kiss -- sometimes more so than watching two queer men kiss. Some said they found this as erotic as two women kissing might be to a straight guy. This got me wondering: Why are some gay men sexually turned on by straight men? Some even prefer straight men over gay men!
Before I get readers insisting that not all lgbtq+ men are attracted to direct men, let me say I know that. I know, too, that it's politically incorrect to admit that there are lgbtq+ men who are attracted to and pursue straight men, thanks to the myth that we gay men will pursue anyone who's male, ignoring social norms and acceptable etiquette. Of course this is ridiculous. In truth, it's so ridiculous that I performed some stand-up comedy on the topic, which you can see here:
Because of the projection from many a threatened straight male -- that every gay gentleman is going to want to hit on him -- queer men have silenced themselves on this topic
Why do gay guys keep hitting on me?
What's with the same-sex attracted man trying to fuck the straight man? I mean, I understand the fantasy element to a degree, but the persistence almost makes me wanna beat some ass. Not in a sexual fashion, of course.
— Tired of It
Dear Homo,
I dislike to break this to you, but gay guys don't hit on another guy unless they ponder he's gay or bi. I'm thinking maybe your friends know something you don't.
Here's what happens when we gay guys meet a straight guy who turns us on: We try to acquire to know him and figure out if he's closeted or bi without coming on to him. We're not overt for obvious reasons: 1) We might get the erroneous kind of pounding; 2) We might ruin our chances if he's a closet case who wigs out; and 3) We set ourselves up for an extremely awkward or humiliating experience if we're wrong about his orientation.
So, we look for certain signals during a conversation — does he hold eye contact longer than usual? Does he have a girlfriend or wife? Does he carry up women? Is he giving off a sexual vibe? Does he appear personally interested in what you're saying? Does he seem interested, period? If we perceive him to be straight, we don't g